All About Preschoolers

Written on October 15, 2009 by emily

I will soon write about our most recent adventures (welcoming baby Elias into the world!) but for now, I’ve got to give in to some humor. It helps me through these first tough days of figuring out just how all this is going to come together. So have a read, and add your wisdom in some comments below!

Some things you probably know if you have a preschooler (or two):

1. There are the sippy cups that are useful, and the sippy cups that are for entertainment value only.
2. The “entertainment” sippy cups clutter your cupboards and add more frustration to your life than they are worth, so do yourself a favor and either let them live in the toybox or the trash receptacle (my favorite choice).
3. Safety pins really are a necessity. Especially when your child who cannot yet dress themselves discovers how to un-dress themselves. Please note that un-dressing often leads to un-diapering and those messes are quite un-desirable.
4. You can train your sticky food-covered child to stand up and turn around in their feeding chair so you can extract them without much mess on yourself. I recommend heading straight for the bathtub to minimize the spread of the mess to any other part of the house.
5. If you have more than one child, you must remember that children have a keen sense of justice. If there isn’t one for everyone, there isn’t one for anyone. This applies to fruit snacks, lollipops, bracelets, hairbrushes, Lightning McQueen cars, mini baby strollers, hospital ID bands, tictacs, smoothies, backpacks, envelopes, etc.
6. Likewise, if you have one for everyone, you must be prepared to police (or at least train) your children that everyone must have one…not two or three while the other has none.
7. Most anything can become an artistic tool, especially on the canvas of a toddler-sized body or your beautiful white walls. This applies to: makeup of any variety, chapstick, bandaids, stickers, ketchup, ranch dressing, any dressing, diaper cream (be especially wary of the kind that comes in a tub), hand soap, poop, etc.
8. All the best songs to sing with kids are the ones that you can never get out of your head. Examples: B-I-N-G-O, The Wheels on the Bus, The Ants Go Marching, The Song that Doesn’t End, There’s a Hole in the Bottom of the Sea…
9. If you are seating two toddlers beside each other at a table, in a stroller, in the car, in a shopping cart, on an airplane, or really anywhere else, it is recommended that you be prepared for squawking and squirming, poking and screaming to the point that you must remove one from the situation.
10. Most people who travel with toddlers-in-tow also host a number of incredible science experiments in the back seat of their vehicles. The under car seat and floor areas are especially fully if interesting specimens. Apparently, some of the specimens are also edible even after several weeks (or dare I say, months). It is recommended that you vacuum out your car in whatever intervals you’re comfortable with, considering that you cannot always keep your children from eating what they find.

There’s a start! Any more mom wisdom out there to add? I want to hear it!

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